Brandon Fisher, CJ Kirkwood & Faizan

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Brandon Breaks Records- Mouth and MacNeal

Written by: Brandon Fisher

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Welcome to the Mouth and MacNeal how-to-meet-people instructional LP “How Do You Do?” Talking to people can be a dangerous and frightening thing. Did you know 100% of serial killers are people? To prove to others that you do need intend to; kidnap, murder, dismantle and hide their corpse - you need to come off as kind, approachable and non-psychotic. One needs a good pick up line to make a great first impression (unless they are deaf in which case you will need a good pick up sign, which can be found in the inside liner of this LP. If they are both deaf and blind you will need a psychic to communicate directly to them through telepathy.)

Mouth will help guide you through some lines depending on the occasion for maximum effectiveness. For example, comment on the environment, “I wouldn’t be caught dead here.” Comment on the other person’s appearance, “You’re so pretty, I bet even your corpse is attractive.” Comment on the other person’s attire, “How flammable is that shirt?” Comment on the evening, “Feels like a good night for knifing.” And many, many more examples can be used at your discretion.

If you feel you have purchased this recoding in error and intended to purchase the Mouth and MacNeal how-to-murder-people instructional LP. Please contact Mouth and MacNeal at the address on the back as manufacturing errors have been known to occur.

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